Episode #33:

How to Have a Happy Mother's Day

A few years ago, I got a call around 3:00 on Mother’s Day. A dear friend asked me if I would be able to meet her for a drink before dinner. Hell yes. We had both had less than ideal days that were meant to celebrate us but instead were filled with cranky kids and unmet expectations. We needed to commiserate.

And at the risk of sounding like a terrible mother I’m going to be honest – our cocktail hour was the best part of my day. We laughed, we cried and we went back to our families restored and reconnected.

It reminded me of what my dear friend and mentor Carrie Contey has always said about Mother’s Day – ask for what you want.

For some women, spending Mother’s day with their children or their own mother or mother-in-law is perfect. For others, not so much. It can be a vulnerable day, especially if you have lost your mother, have a tricky relationship with her, or if motherhood is not living up to your expectations at the moment.

So now is the time to ask for what you want from this day. Does being with your children and having them make you breakfast in bed sound ideal? Do it. Do you want to binge Netflix shows you never get to watch because you’re asleep in your kid’s bed at 8pm? See if your partner (or babysitter) can bring your kids to Kung Fu Panda 4 while you order a pizza with your favorite toppings. Do you want to journal and cry about missing your mom? Just as valid.

I want a mix – a little time with my family and a little time to myself. So you’ll probably find me eating home made pancakes in the morning followed by a matinee viewing of a movie SOLO and maybe even a cocktail with a friend afterward. And I’m going to ask for this now – so my partner knows what is going to fill my cup on a day meant to celebrate me. No surprises, no disappointments.

On today's "Good Enough Parenting" podcast, I share more thoughts about Mother's Day and ask, "What do you want your Mother’s Day to look like?" Despite what Hallmark tells us, there’s no wrong way to do it. As long as you do it your way, that's good enough.